Maintaining that constant balance to keep the thermostat consistent as we mothers are adapting to the everchanging needs of our family is difficult, isn’t it? Juggling all of our responsibilities isn’t easy, and in my opinion, intentional mothering is one of the toughest (mental and emotional) work we will ever be asked to do.
If you are anything like me, you have struggled at some point in your life with being patient. A very young Natalie had to come up with a plan when the weight that my impatience had left me, felt crushing. The conviction I had in this area was definitely at the top of my list to conquer. I wanted to have victory, but I really had no clue where to start.
I know it’s cliché to say that the Bible has all the answers we will ever need, and I admit I was one of those young people who used to wrinkle up her nose at what that really meant. It was probably more out of not understanding what was actually in the Bible that led me to be so apprehensive.
The young Natalie, would get frustrated a lot (mostly at myself) because “I wasn’t good enough at (fill in the blank) because my child was doing such-and-such” or maybe I was frustrated when trying to communicate my perspective on an important topic to discuss with Jason.
“It must be all my fault that life is headed in a direction that makes me feel all flustered.” I was the queen of self-condemnation.
Ladies, the struggle was real and the thinking errors were evident. It crippled my growth and it blinded my ability to have clarity in identifying the root cause of it. The level of my impatience was an iniquity I knew I had to overcome, but thought it was truly going to be the end of me. It felt all consuming.
I can not express enough how transforming the Word of God has been in my life. His Word not only convicts me, but it constantly gives me direction and purpose.
There isn’t a formula or a 1, 2, 3 step process into becoming the perfect Christian. But when we read Scripture, the Holy Spirit deposits Truth into our hearts. When we receive it, this allows room for growth in our lives if our prideful self makes room.
The Bible promises that His Truth doesn’t return void, so experiencing His grace when we don’t deserve it (because we are going to mess up a lot!) is the best kind of redemption possible.
So what I am about to share with you are 3 very significant and noteworthy Truths on how the Lord helped me overcome this very touchy subject- and one not so pretty. I am convinced these have been my saving grace in the area of patience.
The first scripture comes from Proverbs 9:10 which says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.”
Mothers need wisdom to make good decisions for their family. This scripture tells us that if we know who God is, then we will know who we are in relation to the Almighty.
By humbly taking our position under God’s authority, we recognize our need to have a teachable spirit. As mothers, we need to have a learning spirit so we can apply what God is teaching us. This “willing to be willing” attitude helps facilitate spiritual growth and insights so we may pass these onto our children.
Failing forward is not only sanctifying; it’s humbling!
The second fundamental Truth emphasizes the need to have self-discipline in our priorities. Matthew 6:33 says, “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.”
God needs to be first in my life, my husband second, and children third. Everything else comes after these priorities.
We can get so distracted with outside events and lose sight of our divine purpose. Allow God to work in our hearts so we can maintain these priorities as keepers of our homes.
1 John 2:16 says, “For all that is in the world, the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life, is not from the Father but is from the world.”
We all struggle with desires, but when I place Christ first in my life, I find that I am not distracted with what the world has to offer.
Thirdly, we need to be able to self-evaluate.
Remember our analogy with the thermostat? (Go here for that) Well, that other part, the thermometer serves that purpose.
If a thermostat did not have a thermometer in it, then the thermostat would not have a base-line to determine if we need to turn the temperature up or down. The thermostat would never know when or where to shut off or on.
By self-evaluating, we can determine if we need to increase or decrease our behaviors or responses. We can see that we may need to make an adjustment when we take the temperature of our home based on our environment.
If you sense a child struggling with something, perhaps scheduling a one-on-one time, or maybe we need to make our prayers more specific for those circumstances. Maybe we were too harsh with our husband this morning. Being able to self evaluate causes us to self-correct.
My husband tells me I do too much self-evaluation at times, and I can do a better job at giving myself grace in areas I fail in. But I do believe this practice is vital to keeping us humble. And we will never go wrong if we take a humble stance before our families every time.
Here are some of the things I ask myself throughout the day:
Am I in God’s Word every day?
Am I managing my time well?
Have I placed importance on clearing my conscious, apologizing, or forgiving this week?
Do I need to surrender something that is a source of frustration?
Is kindness evident on my tongue?
Is Truth being upheld in my home?
Are we diligent and working “as unto the Lord?
Are we spending time together having fun?
Are we having honoring conversations?
Are both Jason and I creating a safe place for our children to share their heart?
How can we best care for those entrusted to us?
Reiterating here: Mamas need wisdom, self-disciplines, and be able to self-evaluate to maintain that constant balance to keep the thermostat consistent as we adapt to the everchanging needs of our family.
None of us will ever have this perfectly figured out or have the right response 100% of the time. The good news is Jesus knew that creating a life-giving home for our families can be a beautiful process, with many years invested, taken one day at a time, one season at a time.
And if He knew all of these things, then we can rest in His grace knowing He will take care of where we fall short.
My prayer is that you find yourself encouraged today.
Natalie